"I don't make mistakes"

So many people have sent emails of support and promise of prayer. Thank you for those. On Monday morning we have our appointment with the perinatologist at St. Vincents Hospital in Portland. There we will meet with a genetic counselor and have a high-definition ultrasound. Hopefully they will be able to tell us more details then.

The other evening I had a great talk with my friend Jen whose daughter was born with a couple of birth defects. I would encourage you to read her blog from the beginning (she hasn't had it that long). It was so good to talk to someone who had been through a similar situation. I had so many questions... especially about the possibility of an amniocentesis. Anyway, I shared with her how I kept having these thoughts that I know aren't true, yet I kept thinking them. For example We hesitated about having a third child. Maybe God really didn't want us to have a third, so this is what we get kind of thing. I know it sounds horrible, but I kept thinking it. She told me how she believes that even though we have the ability to reproduce, every baby that is conceived is a miracle and was uniquely designed by God. Last night as I laid in bed I remembered a line from the picture book "You Are Special" by Max Lucado. It is about a community of wooden people. One of them goes to see Eli the woodcarver. Eli says, "You are special because I made you and I don't make mistakes." I kept hearing that over and over in my head. God was saying "I don't make mistakes."